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The intensity many couples feel before marrying is usually great affection boosted by commonality, chemistry, and anticipation.

These may be the seeds of love, but they have yet to sprout.

The third is respect, "the ability to see a person as he [or she] is, to be aware of his [or her] unique individuality," and, consequently, wanting that person to "grow and unfold as he [or she] is." These three components all depend upon the fourth, knowledge.

You can care for, respond to, and respect another only as deeply as you know him or her.

The way God created us, actions affect our feelings most.So I decided to try out the "giving leads to love" theory. A few days later I offered to help her with a personal problem. This is why your parents (who've given you more than you'll ever know) undoubtedly love you more than you love them, and you, in turn, will love your own children more than they'll love you.On another occasion I read something she'd written and offered feedback and praise. Because deep, intimate love emanates from knowledge and giving, it comes not overnight but over time ― which nearly always means after marriage. Obviously, there's a huge distance from here to the far more profound, personal love developed over the years, especially in marriage. Susan learned about this foundation of love after becoming engaged to David. Love is that feeling you get when you meet the right person." Every hand went up. Judaism actually idealizes this universal, unconditional love.

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